Warning: Family Under Construction
Written by: Lydia D’Ross, Renewal Program Outreach Chaplain and ordained minister
Building relationships with those who matter most to you can sometimes feel as if you are in a dangerous construction zone. Did you ever feel like that? It can be family stressors like a recent divorce, death in the family, financial stress, or the children are driving you crazy, and you wonder when I am going to get off this merry go round. Especially when it comes to our kids, we often say “kids will be kids”. Godly parents who invest time in properly training their children not only create strong families, but they also help build a stable strong environment that have a positive effect on those around them.
No one is born knowing how to be a parent. In some families, the dynamics of environment does not allow for healthy growth, and there are many reasons for that. You may have been brought up in an environment with alcoholism, where life was chaotic and you vowed never to raise a family that way. Now that you have your own family, though, you may find yourself in similar situations. It is it too late for you to have a healthy family? No, it is never too late.
It is our responsibility as parents to raise our children to become productive citizens. Parents have the hardest job in raising children. The Word says, “our sons should be mature and our daughters should be polished like stones that fit in a palace.” (Psalms 144:12)
How do we break the chain of generational emotional baggage that we bring to our marriage and pass on to our children? We call this family under construction. Meaning, we work at it until that cycle breaks. Changing our unwanted behaviors starts with the parent. The behavior of children may sometimes reflect the behavior of the parents. Every household has a personality of its own that is determined by the character of each of the individual family members.
Your family may be in a place where you feel communication could be better. It is an ongoing process and, sometimes, the hindrance can be emotions like un-forgiveness, unwanted hurt, discord or feeling unloved. Families that lack forgiveness are hurting, and, as a result, are unhappy families. We want you to know that we at Brookhaven Renewal Christian Care program can help you identify those behavior triggers that will help you through this time of construction with your family.